Guys, I have started my grad school application. I am nervous beyond belief. The priority deadline was Feb 1, and I missed that by a couple days by the time I was looking seriously at the program. However, I have been emailing the program director and she has been very encouraging. I'm just not certain how straight forward they are being with me.
I want to know how many people are applying, how many get in, what my chances are for getting into the program with only a year of NICU experience, and all of the other questions swirling around in my head. Oh gosh, this is nerve wracking!
For the application only being $50, it's not that bad. However, do I have what it takes? I'm just a baby nurse with a passion for NICU, but I have this burning desire to go further in school and start getting changes started nation wide, or at least in whatever vicinity I'm in. If I could have been here practicing as a midwife, I could have saved lives! I could have saved babies and their mamas from having the terrible home births that ended up killing one or both of them. I'm not saying that home births are bad. I'm just saying home births with a midwife who has never been formally trained is dangerous and asking for trouble.
I want to change the way midwifery is seen in the US. I want to save the lives of moms and babies by preventing too many medical interventions while simultaneously having the training and supplies to provide necessary interventions to keep everyone safe.
Ugh, I feel so helpless.
I am presently terrified.
I am currently in need of another change. I feel like I could actually make a difference.
Oh L-rd, direct me in the ways you want me to go! Make my path straight and show me what it is I'm supposed to be doing!
Probably doesn't help that I've rewatched Call the Midwife on Netflix...
Showing posts with label return to school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label return to school. Show all posts
Monday, February 27, 2017
Thursday, February 2, 2017
New Culture
The floor I work on consists of all Women's health and the related fields. We have Labor and Delivery, Newborn Nursery, NICU (my unit), and the women specific Med/Surg floor (specifically for C Sections, hysterectomies, and various other health troubles specific to women). In other words, this floor has way too much estrogen. Seriously, WAY TOO MUCH!!!
Our floor, regardless of the unit, is known throughout the hospital and town for being very cliquey, having troubles with new hires (experienced and non-experienced employees), and difficulties with doctors.
Having experienced many of the troubles myself, I am attempting to change the culture for our new people. I have met 3 of them. We have 1 lady who is training on night (already did orientation on days) and is from a med/surg floor in our hospital. She's really sweet and I think we will get along just fine. We have another new grad gal, who is still orienting on days. She seems very excited and eager to start working. I think she'll be fun. I hope so. There is one lady who is going to be PRN, so I'm thinking she's already been a NICU nurse somewhere else and likely has another job. I guess we'll see how that goes. There are 2 others that I have not met and one of them is a guy!
Oh. My. Gosh. You would not believe the ugly things some of the girls were saying. They went off for hours about how the ICU nurse that started and oriented when I did left and so they are quite convinced that's what's going to happen with this guy as well. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the 4 girls that were bitching about her are the reasons she left. That ICU nurse absolutely loved the work, but she knew she could not ultimately handle the people on the unit, so she decided to go PRN instead of being miserable.
These girls were saying that this guy nurse won't be able to help with breastfeeding, that the parents will be uncomfortable with him being their nurse, and also that he won't fit in. You know what? Guy nurses are often aware that moms may not be comfortable being taught to breastfeed from a guy. Guys are also able and willing to tell moms that and offer to have one of the lady nurses help. Guys are better on their feet with critical kids, especially an experienced ICU nurse (as he is). He's also been an ICU charge nurse FOR YEARS!!! He's great with dealing with difficult situations, uncooperative parents, and the ridiculous hormonal troubles that come along with so many women in one area. I think he could bring in some rational thought to a regularly touchy-feelly environment that has cat fights on a regular basis because apparently we are all in fucking middle school.
I'm working on treating these girls as people, talking with them as if they were/are the practicing nurse for the day, and I'm trying to talk to them about life. You know, small talk kinds of things. How are you liking it here? When do you come to nights? Are you married? What do you like to do? All the crap that you have to start off with to break the ice. When I was new, I had to ask all those questions, nobody welcomed me in that way (except the couple of people who I had shadowed, which is why they shadow, everybody loves them!)
Maybe if at least one person accepts them and brings them into the group, they won't feel outcast and they won't feel as though nobody wants them. I want them. I think they will do great. It's a great job, fun work, and we make a difference in the lives of these kids and parents every day. I didn't feel like I was making a difference when I was on med/surg floors because some people didn't want help and other times I was too busy to be any good to anyone.
Hopefully everything will turn out great.
Hey, bonus! I'm making friends on my own unit finally! I am still not in with the mean girls. However, I'm scheduling myself with the other more experienced nurses on nights when I like the charge nurse and the whole night is more fun, relaxed, and more comfortable. Even if some of the not-nice girls are on, I have allies. It certainly helps life and work run a lot smoother. And, in the process, I made more friends. People are finally starting to open up to me and include me in their plans.
P.S. I emailed my master's program for Nurse-Midwifery. Turns out that if you go to school for an extra 2-3 semesters, you end up with a doctorate. I'm seriously considering starting school back up. Even if the commitment is only for 2 years and I think about the doctorate as I am in school and deciding if I can finish it. I guess we'll see.
P.P.S. I started reading Praying for You Future Husband and, in the process, I'm getting encouraged and praying a lot for myself. It's written by Robin Jones Gunn and Tricia Goyer. They have prayers for the guy and for yourself at the end of each chapter, they go over their own personal stories, as well as stories of various other women. I'm really enjoying the book and the process. I don't know, maybe years down the road G-d has somebody in store for me that can handle all of this mess.
Our floor, regardless of the unit, is known throughout the hospital and town for being very cliquey, having troubles with new hires (experienced and non-experienced employees), and difficulties with doctors.
Having experienced many of the troubles myself, I am attempting to change the culture for our new people. I have met 3 of them. We have 1 lady who is training on night (already did orientation on days) and is from a med/surg floor in our hospital. She's really sweet and I think we will get along just fine. We have another new grad gal, who is still orienting on days. She seems very excited and eager to start working. I think she'll be fun. I hope so. There is one lady who is going to be PRN, so I'm thinking she's already been a NICU nurse somewhere else and likely has another job. I guess we'll see how that goes. There are 2 others that I have not met and one of them is a guy!
Oh. My. Gosh. You would not believe the ugly things some of the girls were saying. They went off for hours about how the ICU nurse that started and oriented when I did left and so they are quite convinced that's what's going to happen with this guy as well. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the 4 girls that were bitching about her are the reasons she left. That ICU nurse absolutely loved the work, but she knew she could not ultimately handle the people on the unit, so she decided to go PRN instead of being miserable.
These girls were saying that this guy nurse won't be able to help with breastfeeding, that the parents will be uncomfortable with him being their nurse, and also that he won't fit in. You know what? Guy nurses are often aware that moms may not be comfortable being taught to breastfeed from a guy. Guys are also able and willing to tell moms that and offer to have one of the lady nurses help. Guys are better on their feet with critical kids, especially an experienced ICU nurse (as he is). He's also been an ICU charge nurse FOR YEARS!!! He's great with dealing with difficult situations, uncooperative parents, and the ridiculous hormonal troubles that come along with so many women in one area. I think he could bring in some rational thought to a regularly touchy-feelly environment that has cat fights on a regular basis because apparently we are all in fucking middle school.
I'm working on treating these girls as people, talking with them as if they were/are the practicing nurse for the day, and I'm trying to talk to them about life. You know, small talk kinds of things. How are you liking it here? When do you come to nights? Are you married? What do you like to do? All the crap that you have to start off with to break the ice. When I was new, I had to ask all those questions, nobody welcomed me in that way (except the couple of people who I had shadowed, which is why they shadow, everybody loves them!)
Maybe if at least one person accepts them and brings them into the group, they won't feel outcast and they won't feel as though nobody wants them. I want them. I think they will do great. It's a great job, fun work, and we make a difference in the lives of these kids and parents every day. I didn't feel like I was making a difference when I was on med/surg floors because some people didn't want help and other times I was too busy to be any good to anyone.
Hopefully everything will turn out great.
Hey, bonus! I'm making friends on my own unit finally! I am still not in with the mean girls. However, I'm scheduling myself with the other more experienced nurses on nights when I like the charge nurse and the whole night is more fun, relaxed, and more comfortable. Even if some of the not-nice girls are on, I have allies. It certainly helps life and work run a lot smoother. And, in the process, I made more friends. People are finally starting to open up to me and include me in their plans.
P.S. I emailed my master's program for Nurse-Midwifery. Turns out that if you go to school for an extra 2-3 semesters, you end up with a doctorate. I'm seriously considering starting school back up. Even if the commitment is only for 2 years and I think about the doctorate as I am in school and deciding if I can finish it. I guess we'll see.
P.P.S. I started reading Praying for You Future Husband and, in the process, I'm getting encouraged and praying a lot for myself. It's written by Robin Jones Gunn and Tricia Goyer. They have prayers for the guy and for yourself at the end of each chapter, they go over their own personal stories, as well as stories of various other women. I'm really enjoying the book and the process. I don't know, maybe years down the road G-d has somebody in store for me that can handle all of this mess.
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