Fantastic Weekend Review

Hey y'all, how was your weekend? I hope it was fun, or at least relaxing.

Mine was super fun. After going to the barbeque that I kinda initiated... I got to spend nearly an entire day with my Mema. Oh goodness, I LOVE her!!! We drove about 2 hours to go look at the leaves that are changing colors and scoped out some camping spots for next summer with the whole extended family. Super exciting and it killed my back sitting for nearly 5 hours cramped in a car. That's one of the only times I wish I had a little bit shorter legs. That and the fact that I'm taller than most guys... Therefore I tower over the cutie pies I may/may not crush on and I would like to find a guy that's a bit taller than me. I don't know why that's a thing, but I want to feel petite and feminine next to a guy and not like a frickin' giant.

Anywho, I also got to ride horses for about an hour and the horse kept running! Oh my goodness I should have shortened those stirrups. Since I didn't, but bum is a bit sore because I couldn't stand in the stirrups to prevent bouncing up and down about a foot with each horse step. I almost felt like I was going to get thrown too because I was not prepared for the horse to start running, he just took off!

Well, Roommate's mom loves taking pictures. I HATE being in pictures. I loose the argument with her every time because I just adore her! So, I took a picture with Roommate Mama's boyfriend (of 10 years). He's awesome. Really, they have an amazing family. Later that night this picture was posted on the boyfriend's Facebook page. About 5 minutes later he gets a call. Keep in mind it is about 9 at night and where we're from, it's not okay to call after 9 unless it's an emergency. The call was from his nephew and the nephew was asking who I was. He told the boyfriend I was "hot" and some other very flattering descriptive phrases that I was not informed about. Haha, that made me feel significantly better after them silly high school boys told me to try harder. I wasn't even wearing make-up in the picture and my hair was all wind-blown from having ridden horses. So, while I should not be so easily upset and encouraged by these little comments, I am just now coming into being noticed by guys and noticing them back. Plus, the guy that was diggin' on me is a few years older and has a bigger pool of girls and still thought I was worth a "double take". Good thing it was dark when they told me because I was blushing all over!

My brother got a girlfriend. Have I told you about that yet? She got him to smoke pot less and he doesn't drink as much, so that's good. He took the new girlfriend to meet my mama over the weekend without warning mom that the girlfriend was coming. Nobody is telling me anything besides the fact that it went okay. I'm kinda hoping that there are some better stories than that but I guess I'll just have to dig some more this week.

I'm gonna go try to be productive today. We'll see how far that gets me. Also, I think I need to come up with better nicknames for Roommates family... Maybe that's what I'll do today.

Pinterest Struggles...

It has consumed my time. It has made me dream of my future while also allowing me to show others what I fantasize it will be like. It has also stirred this desire for a beau. Old story with me, I know and I'm sorry.

Does anyone else get like this? I have no prospects, nor do I really know any eligible bachelors, let alone ones that have the same morals and boundaries as me, but I still find myself hoping that G-d will bring me someone... yesterday (aka right now; I never understood that saying until a few years ago but my mom had been using it since I was a little kid!).

I don't understand what's wrong with me! I used to be okay being independent, single, and focused on school. I didn't understand the attraction to boys and I was fine looking and acting like a boy. Now I walk down the halls, minding my own business, and there are cute boys everywhere. Maybe I'm just now hitting puberty? Perhaps G-d really will bring me someone. Maybe I'm just going nuts and should see a professional to get some meds. I don't know. Regardless, this nonsense has got to stop because I am having a rough time focusing on school. It's not really the fault of the general population of males, I guess it's my own fault for finally "seeing" them.

Pinterest has got some cute date ideas though! Also, I fit the country girl description to a T, except for the fact that my country born/raised father raised me up in the city. He still raised me a country girl, but I haven't had the pleasure of knowing everyone in town and being able to go to bonfires with my own friends. Don't get me wrong, I've been to plenty! But my dad is usually the one to start the bonfire party so I was supervised the whole time.

Oy, this is an issue. Life would be so much simpler if: I could just stay a tomboy, focus on school, remain satisfied single, not procrastinate, I had never found Pinterest, and if I could just not "see" silly boys as the handsome guys G-d made you to be...


Side note to guys: Y'all drive us nuts! You can lift 15x more than us girls. Your metabolisms are generally a LOT faster than ours so you can eat just about anything you want. Muscles look way better on you than they do on us. Baseball caps look amazing on you, especially when you're rocking Wranglers or Levi's and some slightly muddy cowboy boots. For some reason you guys know how to fix darn near everything from the washer to the car to the sprinkler system. Your faces look so darn cute with a bit of grease on it. Your sleepy voice, when it's especially deep and a bit scratchy is adorable. When your hair is mussed up it still looks good and I love how when a tall, broad shouldered boy makes me feel small and petite when I'm standin' next to him. Guys, I have heard a lot about how you like the little things us girls do, but the little things you do make us pretty doggone happy too. So, boys, don't underestimate how much we like you and all your male-ness. Let us girls jump in and have some fun too, though. Some of us like fixin' trucks, going muddin', lightin' stuff on fire (it makes my heart happy, but not when it's destructive/bad... just bonfires and stuff), fishin', and shootin'. Also, if you teach us how to watch/play football, you may just have a new football fan to scream at the t.v. with because, let's face it, us girls look pretty darn good in one of your over-sized jerseys.


I better go do my homework and get down on my knees to pray that G-d snap me out of this! It's like the Scotty McCreery song, "The Trouble With Girls," but I am starting to feel the same way about boys... It really seems like my friends already went through this stage in 5th or 6th grade. Here I am, almost 20, just now beginning this inconvenient journey.

Daily Thanksgiving: Today was long, but it was a fairly good day. Perhaps the St. John's Wort is working or maybe it's just a placebo effect. I'm not overly happy, but I'm not down in the dumps. Every day not spent at the bottom makes me think that I can survive and G-d will bring me through because I know He is the only one that can, and He will. I get to go to sleep! Also, I did my hair and my makeup and wore my favorite outfit. My friend said I looked pretty and that made me feel pretty good. I like compliments :)

Knowing vs. Believing

You can totally know something without believing it.

You are made in G-d's image which makes you beautiful, interesting, intricate, and absolutely amazing. This should be common knowledge, but somehow we all lose sight of it. Not only do we forget, but we don't believe it as our reflections stare back at us in the mirror.

We are created as intelligent beings. Somehow we get so caught up in comparing ourselves with those around us, we stop believing that we were made smart, intelligent, and capable of thought. I don't care what disease doctors diagnose you or someone you know with, G-d has given all of us the ability of thought and intelligence.

We are here for a reason. G-d has made us all for a purpose. I don't know mine, but we should be living as though we have a purpose, because we do. We need to be asking G-d what we are supposed to be doing instead of floating through life with no direction. Yes, sometimes life may not be clear and we are supposed to go through uncertain times, it builds faith or something. However, we should be on our knees asking the L-rd what He wants us to be doing.

So, I am here to tell you that you are beautiful, smart, intelligent, interesting, intricate, and you have purpose. We are created in G-d's image, with abilities to carry out thought processes, and all for a reason. You are a daughter or son of THE King.

Instead of listening to the lies that the Enemy tells you, remember these simple truths. As lies begin to pop into your head, speak life over yourself instead of accepting defeat. Eventually, we will be able to go from simply knowing these simple truths to firmly believing them. As our beliefs about who we are and what we are here for, we can begin to fight back against the Adversary. So believe it, you are unique and very important. The Creator of the Universe loves you and cherishes you.



Also, please do me a favor. Begin complimenting the people around you. Constantly be looking for things you like that other people are wearing, doing, or anything around you that you like. Then, this is super important, tell the people! Telling someone that you like their hair, makeup, clothes, note taking, studying tips, ability to explain difficult material, teaching, or work habits (you get it), will help you to make their day. When they get happy with you because of that, you suddenly have new friends and they have a new friend! Plus, you are speaking Life over them. You are helping them to realize that they are beautiful, intelligent, and they have purpose.

Additional challenge: If you are someone who is used to gossiping about others, I challenge you to think of 5 nice things to say about them BEFORE you say anything about them. Then, say those things about them to others. In order for this to work, you have to make sure that the nice things are truly nice with no trace of gossip or negativity. No backhanded compliments (i.e. He's not as good-looking as his brother, bless his heart; or She's pretty but she's not smart enough for that. You catch my drift?). Also, make sure that they are true and you believe them. Saying, "Oh I like your shirt" but you don't actually believe it isn't going to do any good because 1)you're lying, 2) people can tell. This is hard to start doing, but after just a few days, you will be an expert and you will have made a bunch of people's days. Just try it! :)